Officer with Small Dick Assaults a Beautiful Woman That Has Faced Hardships He Will Never Understand

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Well, if you want to spend time with your family this Christmas, don’t be black and don’t live in Texas. If it weren’t for the extreme availability of digital cameras built into nearly every cell phone, the Craig family from Ft. Worth, may have spent their Christmas in the old gray bar motel. Fortunately, the incident was streamed and quickly gained steam through social media. The white officer refused to comment, this is likely because his dick is the width of a candy cane (more…)

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Introduction of Dylan Kelley

Monday 7:30 am

Overcast skies loom overhead, as the rain beats down hard against Dylan’s old, black Continental. Carelessly, he pulls to the side of the road at a blocked off intersection on the corner of 13th and Maddux. It’s usually a calm spot for the big, little city of Camino. Yellow tape is strewn about haphazardly. Dylan stumbles out of his car. Nonchalantly, he ducks under the tape. A uniformed officer rushes towards him. He’s screaming, “This is a crime scene!”

Dylan slurs his words, as a faint scent of bourbon wafts off his lips, “Yeah buddy, man, guy… huh?” With his shoulders slumped deeply, he sways a bit as he continues, “It sure looks that way. You want it?” Dylan’s awkward disposition has clearly distorted the officer’s preconceptions.

“Officer Kelley?” He inquires. 
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Make Up Your Own Mind!

Okay, so ten years ago we all say “fuck France for not siding with us during the war in Iraq.” Now we put French flags over our profile photos? This is like 1984. “We were never at war with Eurasia, we were always at war with Oceania” and two days later “we were never at war with Oceania, we were always at war with Eurasia”. Y’all go follow the herd, whilst I make up my own mind. Ya lazy bunch of fad following, innefectual hippies… How sad…

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