“That Face” Not a Big Deal Anymore in Trump’s White House


Trump strategist and former “Halloween Town” resident, Kellyanne Conway, has been named White House counselor to the president. This goes against Trump’s previous stance that the way a face looks should be a deciding factor in appointment of officials and directly conflicts with his earlier remarks that Carly Fiorina was somehow unfit to be President because “look at that face!” Not good-looking enough to be a president, but good enough for the cabinet certainly sounds par for the course. As Trump has a long history of keeping certain staff seperated from the main living quarters, why should the White House be any different? While Carly clearly resembles an alcohol-worn college drop out that stopped being hot after freshman year and sought out surgery to make the bottom half of her face look like Jay Leno, Kellyanne continues to look like the stuntwoman used in all scenes of “The Nightmare Before Christmas” that may have put the puppet’s looks at risk. All that’s left to ask now is “why the hell does this body-shaming, heartless article so closely resemble an actual news story”? To address that, we must look at our country’s history, what’s important to us moving forward, and then throw up a middle finger, as a big “fuck you” to everything we’ve accomplished so far.

-Contributed by Jackie Coime